Quietly Holding Back

Proverbs 29:11 - "A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back."

This is a verse that has been on my heart and mind quite a bit lately, particularly in the area of defining what "giving full vent to my spirit" can mean and what it may look like in my own life. When we look up the word "vent" in a dictionary it can mean several different things, but here we are looking at the meaning of this word in the context of this verse. That meaning is: "to give often vigorous or emotional expression" to someone over something. In this verse, we are told that a person that does that---that expresses his spirit emotionally and vigorously---is a fool. We are told that a wise man quietly holds that venting of his spirit back. Why would he hold it back? Because he knows that it would do no good not to; that it would more than likely tear-down, rather than build up; that it would hurt, rather than heal; that it would, overall, not edify. I want to apply this to a couple of different situations that we might face in our lives, where we must quietly hold back from the venting of our spirits, for the edification of our brothers and sisters in Christ.

Those situations are. . .

-Holding back a word of frustration towards someone you feel has hurt you, frustrated you---whatever the case may be---in order to save yourself and them from heightened frustrations or hurt through words spoken in anger.

-Holding back an emotional response or statement to someone of the opposite gender, that you might like, in order to best protect their heart and encourage them towards finding their all in Christ.

I am sure that there are many more cases in which this verse may apply, but the above two situations are the most common that I have known of and/or seen.

Quietly holding back from giving full vent to our spirit can sometimes be a very difficult thing, no matter the situation. We want to say what we feel; we want to say what's on our heart---and in some cases, there is a time and a place for that. But we must look at this in light of whether or not giving full vent of our spirits is good for others and those around us. Is it helping them? Is it edifying them? Is it protecting them? When we are quietly holding back (by the grace of God), we can spend time in prayer, get a perspective, and see what is best; therefore, handling it in such a way that is wise and edifying.

Father, keep these truths sensitive to my heart. When I feel I need to vent my spirit, Father, help me to take it before You first; help me to get a perspective, to handle it wisely and in such a way that my brothers and sisters in Christ might be edified, not torn down; that You would, ultimately, be glorified!