"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your heart and your minds in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:6-7
I love those verses in Philippians. They are so true, so comforting. They are verses that I have read over many times. . .as a matter of fact, they are verses that I have practically memorized. Yet, when I read them the other morning, they stuck out at me in a whole new way. The other morning was one of those mornings where I was anxious, where I was fretful. I hate both with a passion, yet I allow my mind to wonder, my fears to take hold of me, and I have to fight not to let them suck every bit of joy that I have. I'm sure some of you know what I am talking about here. . .the absolute misery you can cause yourself by allowing anxiousness, fears, and worries to slowly creep into your mind. Philippians 4:6-7 provides encouragement, comfort, as well as joy when it comes to those things.
I hate worrying. I hate being fretful. Both are aspects about myself that I really do detest and pray that God would continue to help me overcome. In my personal life, I am often fretful over what people think of me, how they might have taken something I said (yes, that's also selfishness). Did they take it wrongly? Do they understand me? Did I hurt them? These questions, my dear friends, can drive a person crazy, while stripping all of our joy from our lives.
In my personal life, I am often fretful and anxious when it comes to my friends. I can all too often let myself worry that I have hurt them in some way, said something wrong, or done something wrong. When the fact of the matter is: I never said anything. I never did anything. It was my fretfulness that created it. (And on a side note here: there are times where I have said and done things that have hurt people I love. I never mean to do it intentionally, but it does happen. And when that does happen, by God's grace, I ask for forgiveness. But God is also teaching me to help place the outcome of that in His hands. . .to not worry about how that person views me afterwards.) I know that my fretfulness over hurting my friends comes from a very deep scar on my heart left by past friendships. Past friendships that were not true friendships; my friends were not true friends. Because of that past, I have very few people that I can call 'close friends', very few people who I trust. With my friendships with those who I do trust, who I love dearly, and care about immensely, I do still fret about them, and I am still anxious (which I'm sure they can occasionally--if not all the time--find annoying). I have let past circumstances and past hurt create in me an anxiousness and a fretfulness with my friendships now. How right is that--to let past circumstances and hurt affect the present, to let the anxiousness that comes from that to suck the joy from my life? How is that trusting in God? It isn't.
God has so greatly been working in my heart in this area in the last couple of weeks. Some of you may be able to relate to the fretfulness and anxiousness in regards to friendships, but for those of you who don't: you could be fretful and anxious over things that you want to make happen. Will it actually happen? What if it never happens? (Wanting to get married would be a good example.) They could be things caused by past hurt. Yet, in either case, we have to stop the thoughts, the questions. We can't let it suck away our joy, invade our minds. . .we have to trust. We have to trust in our God and King. We are not to be anxious about anything, no matter what there is to be anxious over, or what past hurt has caused it. We can take those things to God that we're anxious about, those things we are fretful about. We can lay them at His feet, trusting in His will and His turn-out. By doing that, we are opening a door to peace--peace that comes from God. That peace will guard our hearts and our minds in Christ Jesus. That is guaranteed. I can't help but think how awesome that is, how assuring that is, how comforting that is, how encouraging that is! It is my prayer that God continues to work in my heart in this area; that He will continue to drive out fear and anxiousness so that I may better trust Him. And, dear friends, with that trust and peace in knowing that He will work all out for our good and His glory comes an amazing sense of joy. Overwhelming joy! It has always been and always will be a complete wonder to me how trusting in Him fully can bring so much joy to ones life. Our God is truly good; may we continue to learn to trust in Him fully!
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Following His Calling. . .No Matter What
When I was very young, at six years of age, God placed a calling on my heart. It was a calling that I was not yet able to fully understand at that time in my life, but it was my calling nevertheless. It was a calling to the foreign mission field. Over these past years of my life, I have never been able to part from that calling. Over these past years of my life, the desire to fulfill that calling has only grown, as well as my understanding of what it means to be a foreign missionary. As the years have gone by, I have oftentimes found myself slowly pushing myself away from my calling, only to be jerked right back to an even greater desire to pursue it. There have been so many times over the years where I have been faced with new challenges in regards to being a missionary; fears about what could end up not happening if I did become a missionary. In this blog post, I will be focusing on how God has helped me look to Him when it comes to one very specific fear and one very specific challenge that have both come with the calling He has given me. I imagine that this will end up being a rather lengthy post, as this is completely being written from the heart, but I do pray that it may bless those of you who read it.
What is that one very specific fear and challenge? Well, the one fear started a long, long time ago at a very young age. The one challenge has only come to my realization recently. But for now, I am going to focus on the one fear that started a long time ago. That would be the fear of not getting married if I were to follow my God-given call and become a foreign missionary.
I remember sitting at my sewing table down in my 'sewing room', which is now my bedroom. I was sitting there thinking about my calling to be a foreign missionary. I was sitting there thinking if it was really and truly what God wanted me to do with my life. I was questioning an already so obvious call. I was questioning that call for one reason: I wanted to get married. I wanted to experience the joy and blessings that come with being a mother and a wife. That was a desire that I didn't believe could go along with pursuing my call as a foreign missionary. I was more than willing at that point in time to completely abandon my calling to insure a greater possibility of getting married in the future. I kept walking in that way, ignoring my calling for quite some time, until God jerked me right back to it.
I've always considered it so amazing how God has continually brought me back to my calling to be a foreign missionary, no matter why or for what reason I try to run from it. I am always jerked back to it, never able to ignore it for long. Such is what happened when I was running from my calling to 'insure a greater possibility of getting married in the future.' Through that being 'jerked back', God taught me a valuable lesson: He is all that I need, and in whatever way He is calling me and leading me, I am to follow, no matter what. That means that I am to be a foreign missionary, because I know without one doubt that God has called me to that in life. That does not mean, however, that I do not still have a fear of never getting married. What that means is that I am trusting in what He knows is best for me, what He is calling me to. It is trusting that I am to follow Him, in whatever way He leads, and He will provide for me what He sees fit. It is abandoning all 'fear' over something that I am afraid that I will not have, and knowing that I will indeed have it if that is His will, no matter how impossible it may seem. If it never comes, then praise His blessed name, for I am content in Him! If it does come, then praise His blessed name, for He has blessed me with something that I deemed impossible.
Now I would like to focus on the one challenge that has most recently come into my life: leaving my family. Never before has considering that been difficult. In the past, I have thought about it, but considered it to be one of the least of my fears, and it was most definitely not a challenge. Yet, recently, it has become a challenge. . .a very big challenge.
The other night I was sitting in my sister Hannah and Grace's room, braiding Grace's hair for her. We were talking and laughing, just enjoying having that 'sister time' together. Then out of the middle of nowhere Grace asks me this question: 'Kristin, when you go to college, how long will you be gone for?' I then had to explain to her that 'going to college' didn't always mean that you had to 'go away', but if I were to 'go away' it would be for a couple of years. Grace then frowns and says, 'I really don't want you to go away for that long.' Right then, my heart started to ache. While I won't be 'going away' for college, I knew that I would be 'going away' to the mission field at some point in my life, for time longer than just two years. I sat there pondering those things, thinking about how hard it would be not only on myself when I leave, but for my family also.
When I sat there on my sister's bed thinking about that, I did not once consider not becoming a foreign missionary. By this time, I have known full well that I cannot run from it, but have to meet head on my fears and challenges that come with it. The thought of leaving my family has become one of those challenges. When I think about it--really think about it--it is not an easy thought. When I think about how I may have children and a family and serving on the mission field, I think about how my very own family will not be able to apart of that as much as they would be able to here in the States. It is a challenge. It is a challenge that He will help me in.
The overall point of this blog post is this: God gives us callings in life. He leads us places that we, as human-beings, do not always want to go. We want what we want, we want to do what we want to do. We are oftentimes willing to ignore the obvious callings that He has placed in our lives to make ourselves happy, to make others happy; we do not want to feel like we're being asked to do something that is difficult, or something that takes us out of our comfort zones. The fact of the matter is that God has given each of us a calling in life; a calling that we are to follow and live out to the best of our abilities with His help. Yes, times will come when we are fearful of not getting something that we want if we follow that calling. Yes, times will come where we will be faced with challenges and discomforts by following our calling. Those things do not mean that we do not follow the calling God has given us. We follow it, no matter how difficult or insecure we feel, because He gave us that calling. We are called to look to Him for comfort in all things, to look to Him in every area in our lives that we feel we are lacking in. Every fear, every challenge; we can succeed all when we look to Him, when we view Him as our all in all. He will give us things that we cannot seemingly handle, or find too difficult, but He will be there to help us, to sustain us, to draw us closer to Him.
What is that one very specific fear and challenge? Well, the one fear started a long, long time ago at a very young age. The one challenge has only come to my realization recently. But for now, I am going to focus on the one fear that started a long time ago. That would be the fear of not getting married if I were to follow my God-given call and become a foreign missionary.
I remember sitting at my sewing table down in my 'sewing room', which is now my bedroom. I was sitting there thinking about my calling to be a foreign missionary. I was sitting there thinking if it was really and truly what God wanted me to do with my life. I was questioning an already so obvious call. I was questioning that call for one reason: I wanted to get married. I wanted to experience the joy and blessings that come with being a mother and a wife. That was a desire that I didn't believe could go along with pursuing my call as a foreign missionary. I was more than willing at that point in time to completely abandon my calling to insure a greater possibility of getting married in the future. I kept walking in that way, ignoring my calling for quite some time, until God jerked me right back to it.
I've always considered it so amazing how God has continually brought me back to my calling to be a foreign missionary, no matter why or for what reason I try to run from it. I am always jerked back to it, never able to ignore it for long. Such is what happened when I was running from my calling to 'insure a greater possibility of getting married in the future.' Through that being 'jerked back', God taught me a valuable lesson: He is all that I need, and in whatever way He is calling me and leading me, I am to follow, no matter what. That means that I am to be a foreign missionary, because I know without one doubt that God has called me to that in life. That does not mean, however, that I do not still have a fear of never getting married. What that means is that I am trusting in what He knows is best for me, what He is calling me to. It is trusting that I am to follow Him, in whatever way He leads, and He will provide for me what He sees fit. It is abandoning all 'fear' over something that I am afraid that I will not have, and knowing that I will indeed have it if that is His will, no matter how impossible it may seem. If it never comes, then praise His blessed name, for I am content in Him! If it does come, then praise His blessed name, for He has blessed me with something that I deemed impossible.
Now I would like to focus on the one challenge that has most recently come into my life: leaving my family. Never before has considering that been difficult. In the past, I have thought about it, but considered it to be one of the least of my fears, and it was most definitely not a challenge. Yet, recently, it has become a challenge. . .a very big challenge.
The other night I was sitting in my sister Hannah and Grace's room, braiding Grace's hair for her. We were talking and laughing, just enjoying having that 'sister time' together. Then out of the middle of nowhere Grace asks me this question: 'Kristin, when you go to college, how long will you be gone for?' I then had to explain to her that 'going to college' didn't always mean that you had to 'go away', but if I were to 'go away' it would be for a couple of years. Grace then frowns and says, 'I really don't want you to go away for that long.' Right then, my heart started to ache. While I won't be 'going away' for college, I knew that I would be 'going away' to the mission field at some point in my life, for time longer than just two years. I sat there pondering those things, thinking about how hard it would be not only on myself when I leave, but for my family also.
When I sat there on my sister's bed thinking about that, I did not once consider not becoming a foreign missionary. By this time, I have known full well that I cannot run from it, but have to meet head on my fears and challenges that come with it. The thought of leaving my family has become one of those challenges. When I think about it--really think about it--it is not an easy thought. When I think about how I may have children and a family and serving on the mission field, I think about how my very own family will not be able to apart of that as much as they would be able to here in the States. It is a challenge. It is a challenge that He will help me in.
The overall point of this blog post is this: God gives us callings in life. He leads us places that we, as human-beings, do not always want to go. We want what we want, we want to do what we want to do. We are oftentimes willing to ignore the obvious callings that He has placed in our lives to make ourselves happy, to make others happy; we do not want to feel like we're being asked to do something that is difficult, or something that takes us out of our comfort zones. The fact of the matter is that God has given each of us a calling in life; a calling that we are to follow and live out to the best of our abilities with His help. Yes, times will come when we are fearful of not getting something that we want if we follow that calling. Yes, times will come where we will be faced with challenges and discomforts by following our calling. Those things do not mean that we do not follow the calling God has given us. We follow it, no matter how difficult or insecure we feel, because He gave us that calling. We are called to look to Him for comfort in all things, to look to Him in every area in our lives that we feel we are lacking in. Every fear, every challenge; we can succeed all when we look to Him, when we view Him as our all in all. He will give us things that we cannot seemingly handle, or find too difficult, but He will be there to help us, to sustain us, to draw us closer to Him.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Psalm 104
1 Bless the Lord, O my soul!
O Lord my God, you are very great!
You are clothed with splendor and majesty,
2 covering yourself with light as with a garment,
stretching out the heavens like a tent.
3 He lays the beams of His chambers on the waters;
He makes the clouds His chariot;
He rides on the wings of the wind;
4 He makes His messengers winds,
His ministers a flaming fire.
5 He set the earth on its foundations,
so that it should never be moved.
6 You covered it with the deep as with a garment;
the waters stood above the mountains.
7 At your rebuke they fled;
at the sound of your thunder they took to flight.
8 The mountains rose, the valleys sank down
to the place that you appointed for them.
9 You set a boundary that they may not pass,
so that they might not again cover the earth.
10 You make springs gush forth in the valleys;
they flow between the hills;
11 they give drink to every beast of the field;
the wild donkeys quench their thirst.
12 Beside them the birds of the heavens dwell;
they sing among the branches.
13 From your lofty abode you water the mountains;
the earth is satisfied with the fruit of your work.
14 You cause the grass to grow for the livestock
and plants for man to cultivate,
that he may bring forth food from the earth
15 and wine to gladden the heart of man,
oil to make his face shine
and bread to strengthen man's heart.
16 The trees of the Lord are watered abundantly,
the cedars of Lebanon that He planted.
17 In them the birds build their nests;
the stork has her home in the fir trees.
18 The high mountains are for the wild goats;
the rocks are a refuge for the rock badgers.
19 He made the moon to mark the seasons;
the sun knows its time for setting.
20 You make darkness, and it is night,
when all the beasts of the forest creep about.
21 The young lions roar for their prey,
seeking their food from God.
22 When the sun rises, they steal away
and lie down in their dens.
23 Man goes out to his work
and to his labor until the evening.
24 O Lord, how manifold are your works!
In wisdom have you made them all;
the earth is full of your creatures.
25 Here is the sea, great and wide,
which teems with creatures innumerable,
living things both small and great.
26 There go the ships,
and Leviathan, which you formed to play in it.
27 They all look to you,
to give them their food in due season.
28 When you give it to them, they gather it up;
when you open your hand, they are filled with good things.
29 When you hide your face, they are dismayed;
when you take away their breath, the die
and return to their dust.
30 When you send forth your Spirit, they are created,
and you renew the face of the ground.
31 May the glory of the Lord endure forever;
may the Lord rejoice in His works,
32 who looks on the earth and it trembles,
who touches the mountains and they smoke!
33 I will sing to the Lord as long as I live;
I will sing praise to my God while I have being.
34 May my meditation be pleasing to Him,
for I rejoice in the Lord.
35 Let sinners be consumed from the earth,
and let the wicked be no more!
Bless the Lord, O my soul!
Praise the Lord!
(Photos taken by: Kristin Carr)
O Lord my God, you are very great!
You are clothed with splendor and majesty,
2 covering yourself with light as with a garment,
stretching out the heavens like a tent.
3 He lays the beams of His chambers on the waters;
He makes the clouds His chariot;
He rides on the wings of the wind;
4 He makes His messengers winds,
His ministers a flaming fire.
5 He set the earth on its foundations,
so that it should never be moved.
6 You covered it with the deep as with a garment;
the waters stood above the mountains.
7 At your rebuke they fled;
at the sound of your thunder they took to flight.
8 The mountains rose, the valleys sank down
to the place that you appointed for them.
9 You set a boundary that they may not pass,
so that they might not again cover the earth.
10 You make springs gush forth in the valleys;
they flow between the hills;
11 they give drink to every beast of the field;
the wild donkeys quench their thirst.
12 Beside them the birds of the heavens dwell;
they sing among the branches.
13 From your lofty abode you water the mountains;
the earth is satisfied with the fruit of your work.
14 You cause the grass to grow for the livestock
and plants for man to cultivate,
that he may bring forth food from the earth
15 and wine to gladden the heart of man,
oil to make his face shine
and bread to strengthen man's heart.
16 The trees of the Lord are watered abundantly,
the cedars of Lebanon that He planted.
17 In them the birds build their nests;
the stork has her home in the fir trees.
18 The high mountains are for the wild goats;
the rocks are a refuge for the rock badgers.
19 He made the moon to mark the seasons;
the sun knows its time for setting.
20 You make darkness, and it is night,
when all the beasts of the forest creep about.
21 The young lions roar for their prey,
seeking their food from God.
22 When the sun rises, they steal away
and lie down in their dens.
23 Man goes out to his work
and to his labor until the evening.
24 O Lord, how manifold are your works!
In wisdom have you made them all;
the earth is full of your creatures.
25 Here is the sea, great and wide,
which teems with creatures innumerable,
living things both small and great.
26 There go the ships,
and Leviathan, which you formed to play in it.
27 They all look to you,
to give them their food in due season.
28 When you give it to them, they gather it up;
when you open your hand, they are filled with good things.
29 When you hide your face, they are dismayed;
when you take away their breath, the die
and return to their dust.
30 When you send forth your Spirit, they are created,
and you renew the face of the ground.
31 May the glory of the Lord endure forever;
may the Lord rejoice in His works,
32 who looks on the earth and it trembles,
who touches the mountains and they smoke!
33 I will sing to the Lord as long as I live;
I will sing praise to my God while I have being.
34 May my meditation be pleasing to Him,
for I rejoice in the Lord.
35 Let sinners be consumed from the earth,
and let the wicked be no more!
Bless the Lord, O my soul!
Praise the Lord!
(Photos taken by: Kristin Carr)
Monday, October 18, 2010
The Realization
I love taking walks while the sun is setting. Nothing ends my day better than going on a nice, long walk around our property, especially with a sunset. It can be altogether breath-taking. When I take these walks, I pray. It is my time to be alone with my God, pray to Him, and think about and observe things that have been going on in my life. Last week, on a Friday night, I went on my daily walk. It was perfect. There was no wind, all was still and quiet, with one of the most beautiful sunsets. I acknowledged the beauty, and breathed in that amazingly crisp and cool fall air. Yet, that evening, my heart was extremely heavy. I needed to cry and pray. I needed to be alone; just me and my God. As I walked down the back road behind the house, looking over the newly cut cornfield to the left of me that appeared as a field of gold with the setting sun's rays falling across it, I let it out. I cried and I prayed; I poured out my heart to my God, asking Him to help me with why my heart was so heavy. He did help me, as I knew He would, and He is so good.
I'm sure that you all are wondering what exactly it was that had made my heart feel so heavy. And before I go on with writing this, I must let you all know. Here it is: I long for and desire to have face-to-face fellowship with fellow, like-minded believers. It is something that I have desired for a long time now, something that I very rarely get to experience. I have lived in the middle of southwest Kansas for the majority of my life, in the same town and house my family and I are living in now. Some would say that's sad, others would consider it a blessing to have been raised here (I consider it to be a little bit of both). Ever since I have moved out here, I have never had a person be a true, loyal friend to me (some still have yet to prove themselves). Not one like-minded person have I met in person that I have been able to have a continual, edifying, God-glorifying friendship with; a friend that I could actually fellowship with. There was a time when God blessed me with a friendship that I felt was glorifying to Him. It was such a blessing to me, because I had that Christian fellowship. However, because of how badly I wanted to have that Christian fellowship with that seemingly like-minded friend, I was blinded to who that friend really was. The person that I considered to be one of my best friends turned away from the Lord. And there I was, without a like-minded friend to trust or fellowship with. This happened a little over seven months ago.
The lack of face-to-face fellowship with fellow, like-minded believers over these past seven months is not because of a lack of being around people. What has been lacking and what always has been lacking is the meeting of Christians that actually care and love others; that actually care about and love me for who I am (the same thing goes for my entire family, when it comes to Christians and themselves). When I feel the presence of a caring, loving Christian, it really just makes my day! There is nothing quite so amazing as to feel the presence of someone like you; someone in the faith; a brother/sister in Christ. I love this quote by Charles Spurgeon:
When I meet those Christians, and feel that presence of the spirit, all I want to do is be able to talk with them. It gives me so much joy to do so. So few people realize just how much face-to-face Christian fellowship means to me. It means so much. In a lot of ways, when I fellowship with Christians face-to-face, it encourages me. I know that I am not the only one around here that people consider strange. And while I do enjoy having that label for being a Christian (yes, I do enjoy it, which I'm sure people would call "strange" in and of itself), I also find great joy and encouragement in knowing that I am not the only one! When God blesses me with running into fellow Christians in public that I greatly enjoy being around, it makes my day. I feel that every moment that I have with those people--the fellowship that I have with them, though it may be brief--is something to be completely and totally cherished, because it so rarely happens. . .
. . .which brings us back to myself, with my heavy heart, with my tears, praying to my God, on a Friday night. As I stated earlier on in this post: God did help me, as I knew He would. As I was standing there that evening, looking into the sunset, thinking over the past several months and years that have gone by without much face-to-face fellowship with like-minded, Christian people, God kept pressing one truth upon my heart. That truth being this: my relationship with Him is closer because of it, I have never-ending fellowship with Him. I have not had that face-to-face fellowship that I have wanted with people, but I have grown exceedingly close to my God, and my relationship with Him is strong. What a blessing! What an immense blessing! Something so hard led me to the realization of something so beautiful. When I look at it in that light, when I see what God has been doing in my relationship with Him, the struggle and the hardness of not having what I want to have disappears entirely. Our God is so good, He is worthy to be praised! As I walked home that evening, into that beautiful sunset which had almost disappeared entirely behind the trees; my heart was no longer heavy, the desire to cry had vanished, and my heart was overwhelmed with the goodness of my God.
(Note: It is still a prayer of mine that God would bring someone into my life that I can have the blessing of being able to fellowship with in person on a regular basis. It is also a prayer of mine, however, that I may be fully satisfied with my fellowship with my God until that time comes. I will take the time to add here, before I close this post, that God has blessed me with amazing friends, whom I have met online, and with whom I can fellowship online. One of which has been one of the dearest, most like-minded, best friend that I have ever had. God has blessed my life with her friendship in ways that I'm pretty sure no person that I meet and fellowship with face-to-face ever could. Apart from her friendship, He has blessed me with several other friendships with people that I have met online, as well. Praise be to our sovereign God who truly knows what His children need!) Soli Deo Gloria.
I'm sure that you all are wondering what exactly it was that had made my heart feel so heavy. And before I go on with writing this, I must let you all know. Here it is: I long for and desire to have face-to-face fellowship with fellow, like-minded believers. It is something that I have desired for a long time now, something that I very rarely get to experience. I have lived in the middle of southwest Kansas for the majority of my life, in the same town and house my family and I are living in now. Some would say that's sad, others would consider it a blessing to have been raised here (I consider it to be a little bit of both). Ever since I have moved out here, I have never had a person be a true, loyal friend to me (some still have yet to prove themselves). Not one like-minded person have I met in person that I have been able to have a continual, edifying, God-glorifying friendship with; a friend that I could actually fellowship with. There was a time when God blessed me with a friendship that I felt was glorifying to Him. It was such a blessing to me, because I had that Christian fellowship. However, because of how badly I wanted to have that Christian fellowship with that seemingly like-minded friend, I was blinded to who that friend really was. The person that I considered to be one of my best friends turned away from the Lord. And there I was, without a like-minded friend to trust or fellowship with. This happened a little over seven months ago.
The lack of face-to-face fellowship with fellow, like-minded believers over these past seven months is not because of a lack of being around people. What has been lacking and what always has been lacking is the meeting of Christians that actually care and love others; that actually care about and love me for who I am (the same thing goes for my entire family, when it comes to Christians and themselves). When I feel the presence of a caring, loving Christian, it really just makes my day! There is nothing quite so amazing as to feel the presence of someone like you; someone in the faith; a brother/sister in Christ. I love this quote by Charles Spurgeon:
". . .whenever I find a man in whom there rests the Spirit of God, the spirit within me leaps to hear the spirit within him, and we feel that we are one. The Spirit of God in one Christian soul recognizes the Spirit in another."
When I meet those Christians, and feel that presence of the spirit, all I want to do is be able to talk with them. It gives me so much joy to do so. So few people realize just how much face-to-face Christian fellowship means to me. It means so much. In a lot of ways, when I fellowship with Christians face-to-face, it encourages me. I know that I am not the only one around here that people consider strange. And while I do enjoy having that label for being a Christian (yes, I do enjoy it, which I'm sure people would call "strange" in and of itself), I also find great joy and encouragement in knowing that I am not the only one! When God blesses me with running into fellow Christians in public that I greatly enjoy being around, it makes my day. I feel that every moment that I have with those people--the fellowship that I have with them, though it may be brief--is something to be completely and totally cherished, because it so rarely happens. . .
. . .which brings us back to myself, with my heavy heart, with my tears, praying to my God, on a Friday night. As I stated earlier on in this post: God did help me, as I knew He would. As I was standing there that evening, looking into the sunset, thinking over the past several months and years that have gone by without much face-to-face fellowship with like-minded, Christian people, God kept pressing one truth upon my heart. That truth being this: my relationship with Him is closer because of it, I have never-ending fellowship with Him. I have not had that face-to-face fellowship that I have wanted with people, but I have grown exceedingly close to my God, and my relationship with Him is strong. What a blessing! What an immense blessing! Something so hard led me to the realization of something so beautiful. When I look at it in that light, when I see what God has been doing in my relationship with Him, the struggle and the hardness of not having what I want to have disappears entirely. Our God is so good, He is worthy to be praised! As I walked home that evening, into that beautiful sunset which had almost disappeared entirely behind the trees; my heart was no longer heavy, the desire to cry had vanished, and my heart was overwhelmed with the goodness of my God.
(Note: It is still a prayer of mine that God would bring someone into my life that I can have the blessing of being able to fellowship with in person on a regular basis. It is also a prayer of mine, however, that I may be fully satisfied with my fellowship with my God until that time comes. I will take the time to add here, before I close this post, that God has blessed me with amazing friends, whom I have met online, and with whom I can fellowship online. One of which has been one of the dearest, most like-minded, best friend that I have ever had. God has blessed my life with her friendship in ways that I'm pretty sure no person that I meet and fellowship with face-to-face ever could. Apart from her friendship, He has blessed me with several other friendships with people that I have met online, as well. Praise be to our sovereign God who truly knows what His children need!) Soli Deo Gloria.
Friday, October 1, 2010
He Is My All
This is the question that I dread the most: "Do you have a boyfriend yet?" I hate that question. I detest that question. I absolutely, positively hate being asked that question. That is a question that people have been asking me for years, ever since I was 13 years old (and yes, a few of those questions were asked when I was so young, due to the fact that people took me for being older than what I actually was. . .story of my life, haha). Of course, the answer to that question is always a firm, "No." And with me, just a simple reply of "no" when being asked that question is a very simple answer to walk away with in regards to this particular subject (I do tend to lecture). I've always found it interesting how people these days think that every teen that is in their "older teen years" is in some sort of relationship with someone. For the majority, that is a very, very correct way of thinking, as quite a few teens are in relationships with the opposite gender once they hit the age 16, or even younger. So, that being said, I have been able to see how the asking of that previously stated question is perfectly normal. For the majority of people it is quite normal to ask that question, quite normal indeed. However, it is not in regards to me.
I know that many people that meet me (girls and guys alike) think I'm a bit strange or weird. I'm not sure that I have met someone, or even know someone in person that can put me into the "normal category." It's not normal seeing a young woman walking around the mall, store, etc. in a skirt, nor is it normal to watch a young woman reply with a smile to someone that is being terribly grouchy with her (though, I will not deny that there are many times when I must force that smile to be there in those situations). Not being normal is the story of my life, and I love it! My heart rejoices every time I'm told to my face that I'm "strange" or "weird." It rejoices because I know that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing for His glory! To this world, I should be considered strange! Those comments do not put me down, rather they encourage me in Him!
So, how does this relate to the question, "Do you have a boyfriend yet?" Here's how: I am considered strange for my view on that, too. As I previously stated, asking that question is perfectly normal in regards to most people, but is not in regards to myself. Why? Because what people don't realize is that I do not have one desire whatsoever to have a boyfriend, or be in any sort of a relationship anytime soon. Shocked? Many are when hearing that reply. While I do have a desire to be married in the future, I do not believe that being in a relationship in pursuit of marriage will happen anytime soon, and at this point, I don't want it to. I am sure that many of you are asking yourselves why that is. Here is my answer: I am in love with Jesus Christ. I am in love with God's perfect will for my life, and what He is calling me do to with this life of mine that is His.
Will marriage be a part of that? I do not know. Do I want marriage to be a part of that? At some point, yes, I would like that. But here's the thing: finding the perfect man is not a priority of mine, seeking and dreaming about marriage has never been a priority of mine, and it never will be, unless God leads me otherwise. God is leading me to pursue so many wonderful things in life for His glory; things that I am not sure marriage is supposed to be a part of (and in all honesty, I've always felt that marriage wouldn't be a part of those things, but will not rule out the possibility of getting married at some point in my life, as God could always lead me in that direction). Loving Him, serving Him, and bringing Him the glory in all that I do and say; that is my priority. Nothing else. I am perfectly content in life with Jesus as my all, and being His hands and feet; doing all for His glory. Don't get me wrong, though; I know that those things can be accomplished while in a relationship, and it is so awesome if God is calling you that way, but that is not the way, presently, that He is calling me. Having a "boyfriend", getting married. . .those are all things so far from my mind compared with loving my God, serving Him fully, and bringing Him the glory in all. I am sure that some day God may bring those things closer to my mind and heart, and that will be amazing, and I will praise His name for that. Could He lead me in that direction sooner than I think? He most definitely could and will if that is His will. Until then, I am His and His alone. My affection and love is for Him and Him alone. He is my all.
On a side note: when people wonder why I call young men my brothers; that's why. All that I stated above is 'why'. They are my brothers, and that's how I view them; that's all young men in my life will ever be until God reveals to me otherwise. That is all I desire for the young men in my life to be. And it is such an amazing blessing to me! Now, I do feel that this blog post is a bit different from my previous blog posts, but I felt very strongly led to write this, and I really do pray that it might bless some of you, if that is His will! Soli Deo Gloria!
I know that many people that meet me (girls and guys alike) think I'm a bit strange or weird. I'm not sure that I have met someone, or even know someone in person that can put me into the "normal category." It's not normal seeing a young woman walking around the mall, store, etc. in a skirt, nor is it normal to watch a young woman reply with a smile to someone that is being terribly grouchy with her (though, I will not deny that there are many times when I must force that smile to be there in those situations). Not being normal is the story of my life, and I love it! My heart rejoices every time I'm told to my face that I'm "strange" or "weird." It rejoices because I know that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing for His glory! To this world, I should be considered strange! Those comments do not put me down, rather they encourage me in Him!
So, how does this relate to the question, "Do you have a boyfriend yet?" Here's how: I am considered strange for my view on that, too. As I previously stated, asking that question is perfectly normal in regards to most people, but is not in regards to myself. Why? Because what people don't realize is that I do not have one desire whatsoever to have a boyfriend, or be in any sort of a relationship anytime soon. Shocked? Many are when hearing that reply. While I do have a desire to be married in the future, I do not believe that being in a relationship in pursuit of marriage will happen anytime soon, and at this point, I don't want it to. I am sure that many of you are asking yourselves why that is. Here is my answer: I am in love with Jesus Christ. I am in love with God's perfect will for my life, and what He is calling me do to with this life of mine that is His.
Will marriage be a part of that? I do not know. Do I want marriage to be a part of that? At some point, yes, I would like that. But here's the thing: finding the perfect man is not a priority of mine, seeking and dreaming about marriage has never been a priority of mine, and it never will be, unless God leads me otherwise. God is leading me to pursue so many wonderful things in life for His glory; things that I am not sure marriage is supposed to be a part of (and in all honesty, I've always felt that marriage wouldn't be a part of those things, but will not rule out the possibility of getting married at some point in my life, as God could always lead me in that direction). Loving Him, serving Him, and bringing Him the glory in all that I do and say; that is my priority. Nothing else. I am perfectly content in life with Jesus as my all, and being His hands and feet; doing all for His glory. Don't get me wrong, though; I know that those things can be accomplished while in a relationship, and it is so awesome if God is calling you that way, but that is not the way, presently, that He is calling me. Having a "boyfriend", getting married. . .those are all things so far from my mind compared with loving my God, serving Him fully, and bringing Him the glory in all. I am sure that some day God may bring those things closer to my mind and heart, and that will be amazing, and I will praise His name for that. Could He lead me in that direction sooner than I think? He most definitely could and will if that is His will. Until then, I am His and His alone. My affection and love is for Him and Him alone. He is my all.
On a side note: when people wonder why I call young men my brothers; that's why. All that I stated above is 'why'. They are my brothers, and that's how I view them; that's all young men in my life will ever be until God reveals to me otherwise. That is all I desire for the young men in my life to be. And it is such an amazing blessing to me! Now, I do feel that this blog post is a bit different from my previous blog posts, but I felt very strongly led to write this, and I really do pray that it might bless some of you, if that is His will! Soli Deo Gloria!
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Inspiration
As of lately, I have been reading Foxe's Book of Martyrs. I am sure that most of you that have read that book know how absolutely saddening it is to read, yet how it can be just such an inspiration. I have not yet turned the last page of this book, but have felt so inspired by the reading of the pages that I have read, that I would like to share with you all my thoughts that have come to me as I have read this book. These thoughts have come to me occasionally, but never before with such intensity as they have come with reading this book. I am not ashamed in anyway whatsoever to say that I have cried more than once while reading this book. Never before have I read a book that has left my heart so broken in two. When reading in detail the tortures that many brothers and sisters in Christ underwent for their faith--our faith--my heart would break, as it still does. These tortures were not just any tortures, they were horrifying tortures. Tortures that no human being, especially a child of God, should have to undergo. I would consider myself blessed to just have been beheaded, rather than having to go through the horrific torture in which Christians had to go through for their faith. Yet here comes the inspiring part; the part above all else that made the tears fall from my eyes when reading this book: they never gave in, they never stopped loving God, they never asked Him why they had to suffer so much for believing in Him, they endured all of it with much fortitude, they died ready to be with their Savior. While this book is heart-breaking to read, it is worth it. The level of inspiration that I have obtained from this book is beyond anything I've ever gained when reading a book (other than the Bible).
One of the stories that has lept out at me amongst all the others in the book was a story of a 15 year old boy. 15 years old. This young man was being tortured for being a Christian. Again, he was just 15 years old; younger than I. He endured torture and was in the end martyred, for he would not let go of his faith. He would not utter one word that denied His belief in Christ Jesus. That was very powerful for me to read. So many young men at that age nowadays are so absorbed in themselves that it is disturbing. I often times wonder what those young men would think when hearing of another young man their age being put to death because of a belief that he held so strongly; a Love that he could not deny; a God that he would not forsake. One story was of a man, who upon hearing that a sister in the faith was going to be handed over to the "brutality of lust" (as John Foxe put it), took measures to remove her from such a punishment to save her purity and keep her from the torture into which she was going to enter. Because of the measures he took, and because of helping the woman escape, he was soon found out to be a Christian, and was given the punishment of death. When the woman heard of his punishment for helping her, she went back. She begged that the punishment be given to her, rather than the man that saved her from her punishment. In the end, they were both beheaded and thrown into the fire. I look at that story and am really just amazed. The actions from both the man and the woman (but particularly the woman) was powerful to read. I look at that man and what he did for his sister in the faith and ask myself this: How many men of this world would be willing to do what he did for his sister in Christ? Not many. How many women of this world, even, would do what the woman in that story did when hearing about her brother in Christ's punishment for helping her? Not many. We can all gain so much at just reading the stories of these incredible brothers and sisters in Christ. We can be inspired in so many ways.
The thought that has kept on coming to me while reading this book, while reading of the various tortures in which our brothers and sisters in Christ underwent, is this: Could I do that? Could I? Could you? I have found myself starting to pray that God would give me the strength in Him that I will need if I were to ever undergo any sort of torture for His name. I pray that if I ever have to undergo it, that He would be my strength, my endurance, and my joy. My flesh cowers at the thought of there ever being a possibility; my flesh tells me that I cannot, yet I know with my God as my strength I can. And that is what I must rest in. I don't want to ever cower at such a possibility, but rather be courageous in my Lord, to be able to look at that possibility and say, "Lord, if that time comes I will be ready, for You will be my strength and my endurance. May Your name be glorified."
One of the stories that has lept out at me amongst all the others in the book was a story of a 15 year old boy. 15 years old. This young man was being tortured for being a Christian. Again, he was just 15 years old; younger than I. He endured torture and was in the end martyred, for he would not let go of his faith. He would not utter one word that denied His belief in Christ Jesus. That was very powerful for me to read. So many young men at that age nowadays are so absorbed in themselves that it is disturbing. I often times wonder what those young men would think when hearing of another young man their age being put to death because of a belief that he held so strongly; a Love that he could not deny; a God that he would not forsake. One story was of a man, who upon hearing that a sister in the faith was going to be handed over to the "brutality of lust" (as John Foxe put it), took measures to remove her from such a punishment to save her purity and keep her from the torture into which she was going to enter. Because of the measures he took, and because of helping the woman escape, he was soon found out to be a Christian, and was given the punishment of death. When the woman heard of his punishment for helping her, she went back. She begged that the punishment be given to her, rather than the man that saved her from her punishment. In the end, they were both beheaded and thrown into the fire. I look at that story and am really just amazed. The actions from both the man and the woman (but particularly the woman) was powerful to read. I look at that man and what he did for his sister in the faith and ask myself this: How many men of this world would be willing to do what he did for his sister in Christ? Not many. How many women of this world, even, would do what the woman in that story did when hearing about her brother in Christ's punishment for helping her? Not many. We can all gain so much at just reading the stories of these incredible brothers and sisters in Christ. We can be inspired in so many ways.
The thought that has kept on coming to me while reading this book, while reading of the various tortures in which our brothers and sisters in Christ underwent, is this: Could I do that? Could I? Could you? I have found myself starting to pray that God would give me the strength in Him that I will need if I were to ever undergo any sort of torture for His name. I pray that if I ever have to undergo it, that He would be my strength, my endurance, and my joy. My flesh cowers at the thought of there ever being a possibility; my flesh tells me that I cannot, yet I know with my God as my strength I can. And that is what I must rest in. I don't want to ever cower at such a possibility, but rather be courageous in my Lord, to be able to look at that possibility and say, "Lord, if that time comes I will be ready, for You will be my strength and my endurance. May Your name be glorified."
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Contentment in Waiting
I am so glad to finally be posting this! It is a post that I have been working on and thinking about for quite sometime now. I pray that it may encourage and/or bless some of you that read it.
"Now godliness with contentment is great gain." -1 Timothy 6:6
When looking at the context in which the above verse is set, you will know that "contentment" in that verse is being used in regards to being content when it comes to riches or wanting more. However, I want to use that verse in regards to having contentment in waiting. Not having contentment in such things as money, clothes, books, etc., but rather the contentment that we, as Christians, need to find in waiting. Finding contentment in waiting has been one very hard and very long lesson for me to learn (and I am not done learning it). By God's grace, I have been able to be more content this past year of my life than I ever have been before. Yet there is still a restless feeling that I have about me; a longing and a want to do what God has been calling me to do for years: foreign missions. For well around 6 years now, I have felt the call to be a foreign missionary, and I have always taken that call very seriously. As the years have gone by, and as my desire for the mission field has grown, the harder and harder it has been for me to remain content in waiting. I always felt that I needed to go and be a missionary right then, and if I couldn't, then everything else was just miserable for me. That was literally what it was like at times. I let my discontentment in waiting in that area affect almost every single area of my life. That is not how a child of God should handle discontentment; a child of God should find and strive for contentment in Him. And through Him, we should be content in every area of our life, because He put us there. See, I was so focused on going and being that missionary; fulfilling that calling, that I was letting things go by in my life that I should have been cherishing and finding contentment in. Again, that is not how a child of God should have handled discontentment.
The calling that God has given us (whether that be a calling to the mission field, a calling to be a wife/husband, or a calling to be both, etc.) is a wonderful thing, and we should have a great passion and longing to pursue it and do what He has called each one of us to do in life. But it seems that too many of us (myself included) are often times so easily brought to discontentment when we are not able to pursue our God-given calling quick enough. One thought that I've always had in regards to that was that it's not wrong for me, in any way, to be discontent in not being able to pursue the calling that God gave me. My discontentment in wanting to pursue my calling was not selfish; I wanted to do it because I love my God and I wanted to give Him the glory through the fulfilling of my calling. I want others to know and love Him and give Him the glory that He so undoubtedly deserves! While there is nothing wrong with that pure desire, there is something wrong with why I was discontent. I was failing to look at the bigger picture in regards to that. Yes, my motives were good, but the results were not. Being discontent with having to wait to fulfill the calling God gave was not glorifying to Him. I'm pretty sure there's a reason why I haven't set one foot on a foreign mission field by now. Do I want it? Absolutely. Actually, not to sound too extreme, but my heart is not here; it is in whichever country God places me in. I have such a passion and such a longing for that foreign mission field that I undoubtedly know God has called me to, but God has not blessed me with the fulfilling of my calling as of yet. I handled that with immersing myself in discontentment. What does that say about what I think about God's sovereignty, and about His perfect timing? Is our God not all-sovereign? Does He not have perfect timing for everything? Will He not bless each one of us with the fulfilling of our calling in His own perfect way, and in His own perfect timing? You bet He will! I have been able to find so much contentment in just asking myself those questions and knowing Who my God is and that He knows what is best for me. In that I have found contentment. Trusting in the fact that our all-sovereign God has a reason (and a very good reason) why we must wait, has given me much contentment, and in doing so, handling it in such a way that glorifies Him.
There's yet another valid question to ask ourselves in regards to this, though: what can we be doing with our time now, while we're waiting, to help prepare ourselves to fulfill our God-given calling? I can't fully explain to all of you that might be reading this how God has so greatly used that one, simple question to help me. He has used it so much to help me in regards to finding contentment in every day life while I'm waiting. All I have to do is look around me and see the things and people that God has placed in my life to prepare me for the fulfilling of the calling that He has given me. I've just had to look. That's it. I've just had to look and see with the eyes of someone fully content in Him and His timing for everything. Perhaps another thing that has made me wake up to the horridness of discontentment is the fact that time flies by. Our lives on this earth are very short. We shouldn't be spending it in discontentment in waiting for something; we should take the time while we're waiting and use it; make the absolute most of it for God's glory. When the time comes for us to really fulfill the calling that God has placed on each one of our hearts, we will be able to take what we learned from the time we waited and apply it to our calling. I will never know for sure how exactly God plans to use all of the things in my life now, during this time while I'm waiting, for when I am serving Him on the mission field. I can take a few guesses, but only He really knows, and I do know one thing for certain: He will use them.
Let us all have a zeal and a passion towards doing and fulfilling what God has called us to do in life; but let us also be content in waiting for it to come; content in knowing that God will make it come when He wills it to. And while we're waiting, let us all gain from what we have now; let us not overlook it in discontentment, but let us all learn from and truly cherish all of those simple day-to-day things with the knowledge that God will use them for His glory and our good. Let us be fully content in Him.
"Now godliness with contentment is great gain." -1 Timothy 6:6
When looking at the context in which the above verse is set, you will know that "contentment" in that verse is being used in regards to being content when it comes to riches or wanting more. However, I want to use that verse in regards to having contentment in waiting. Not having contentment in such things as money, clothes, books, etc., but rather the contentment that we, as Christians, need to find in waiting. Finding contentment in waiting has been one very hard and very long lesson for me to learn (and I am not done learning it). By God's grace, I have been able to be more content this past year of my life than I ever have been before. Yet there is still a restless feeling that I have about me; a longing and a want to do what God has been calling me to do for years: foreign missions. For well around 6 years now, I have felt the call to be a foreign missionary, and I have always taken that call very seriously. As the years have gone by, and as my desire for the mission field has grown, the harder and harder it has been for me to remain content in waiting. I always felt that I needed to go and be a missionary right then, and if I couldn't, then everything else was just miserable for me. That was literally what it was like at times. I let my discontentment in waiting in that area affect almost every single area of my life. That is not how a child of God should handle discontentment; a child of God should find and strive for contentment in Him. And through Him, we should be content in every area of our life, because He put us there. See, I was so focused on going and being that missionary; fulfilling that calling, that I was letting things go by in my life that I should have been cherishing and finding contentment in. Again, that is not how a child of God should have handled discontentment.
The calling that God has given us (whether that be a calling to the mission field, a calling to be a wife/husband, or a calling to be both, etc.) is a wonderful thing, and we should have a great passion and longing to pursue it and do what He has called each one of us to do in life. But it seems that too many of us (myself included) are often times so easily brought to discontentment when we are not able to pursue our God-given calling quick enough. One thought that I've always had in regards to that was that it's not wrong for me, in any way, to be discontent in not being able to pursue the calling that God gave me. My discontentment in wanting to pursue my calling was not selfish; I wanted to do it because I love my God and I wanted to give Him the glory through the fulfilling of my calling. I want others to know and love Him and give Him the glory that He so undoubtedly deserves! While there is nothing wrong with that pure desire, there is something wrong with why I was discontent. I was failing to look at the bigger picture in regards to that. Yes, my motives were good, but the results were not. Being discontent with having to wait to fulfill the calling God gave was not glorifying to Him. I'm pretty sure there's a reason why I haven't set one foot on a foreign mission field by now. Do I want it? Absolutely. Actually, not to sound too extreme, but my heart is not here; it is in whichever country God places me in. I have such a passion and such a longing for that foreign mission field that I undoubtedly know God has called me to, but God has not blessed me with the fulfilling of my calling as of yet. I handled that with immersing myself in discontentment. What does that say about what I think about God's sovereignty, and about His perfect timing? Is our God not all-sovereign? Does He not have perfect timing for everything? Will He not bless each one of us with the fulfilling of our calling in His own perfect way, and in His own perfect timing? You bet He will! I have been able to find so much contentment in just asking myself those questions and knowing Who my God is and that He knows what is best for me. In that I have found contentment. Trusting in the fact that our all-sovereign God has a reason (and a very good reason) why we must wait, has given me much contentment, and in doing so, handling it in such a way that glorifies Him.
There's yet another valid question to ask ourselves in regards to this, though: what can we be doing with our time now, while we're waiting, to help prepare ourselves to fulfill our God-given calling? I can't fully explain to all of you that might be reading this how God has so greatly used that one, simple question to help me. He has used it so much to help me in regards to finding contentment in every day life while I'm waiting. All I have to do is look around me and see the things and people that God has placed in my life to prepare me for the fulfilling of the calling that He has given me. I've just had to look. That's it. I've just had to look and see with the eyes of someone fully content in Him and His timing for everything. Perhaps another thing that has made me wake up to the horridness of discontentment is the fact that time flies by. Our lives on this earth are very short. We shouldn't be spending it in discontentment in waiting for something; we should take the time while we're waiting and use it; make the absolute most of it for God's glory. When the time comes for us to really fulfill the calling that God has placed on each one of our hearts, we will be able to take what we learned from the time we waited and apply it to our calling. I will never know for sure how exactly God plans to use all of the things in my life now, during this time while I'm waiting, for when I am serving Him on the mission field. I can take a few guesses, but only He really knows, and I do know one thing for certain: He will use them.
Let us all have a zeal and a passion towards doing and fulfilling what God has called us to do in life; but let us also be content in waiting for it to come; content in knowing that God will make it come when He wills it to. And while we're waiting, let us all gain from what we have now; let us not overlook it in discontentment, but let us all learn from and truly cherish all of those simple day-to-day things with the knowledge that God will use them for His glory and our good. Let us be fully content in Him.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
So Far as the East is From the West
Last evening, I attended a Casting Crowns concert; and while I knew that concert was going to be amazing, I didn't quite expect that it would turn out to be as amazing as it was. So many things talked (and sang) about were things that are dear to my heart, things that I needed to hear, and things that God is continually working in my life to improve. Words cannot fully say how inspiring and uplifting that concert was for me. God spoke to my heart in so many ways through the songs that were sang and the words that were being said. It was just amazing. His name was being praised and glorified, the love for Him pouring out of the hearts of His children through singing, shutting their eyes, raising their hands, and bowing their heads was amazing; I thank God for that experience. It was truly a blessing to be a part of. Starting with this post, I will be taking the songs that were sung at the concert (particular lines in the songs, that God used to really speak to my heart), and will be sharing with you all how God used them in my life.
Today, particularly, I am feeling strongly led to write about their song "East to West." Before they started playing that song Mark Hall (the lead singer) was talking about how often times we tend to dwell so much on our sin rather than who we really are in Christ because of what He did for us on the Cross. Personally, that was something that I really needed to hear. I am one that goes through times where I am pretty disgusted with my sin; and while I really do believe that is something that a Christian should feel in regards to their sin, I also believe that we can oftentimes belittle and "limit" God's grace because of it. But here's the thing: yes, we should get to that point with our sin to where we are just so disgusted with it and cry out to God that it be removed from our lives; but instead of dwelling on that, and letting that rule your thoughts, cast it down at Christ's feet and know that no matter what your sin is, it is indeed covered by Him. Have that knowledge of sin in your life, know what the sin is, pray to get rid of it, but don't dwell on it. Dwell on Christ and what He did for you; dwell on the fact that yes, our sin is terrible, but yes, God has covered it with the blood of His Son. Let the horridness of your sin make you so overwhelmed with love for our God who has taken it away through His Son! This is something that God is still teaching me, but by His amazing grace, I know that I will at some point in my life grasp the reality of the above. While I do grasp it at times, I long and pray that I may be able to grasp it all of the time!
"So far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:12
"I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." Galatians 2:20
Those two verses out of the Bible are two verses that are very dear and near to my heart. I pray that God continues to use them mightily in my life, that I may be able to see who I am in His Son, that I may be able to read them and know that it is no longer I who live, but Christ Who lives in me. That I may know that the life that I now live I live by faith in Him, Who loved me and gave Himself for me and you. That I may know that He has cast my sin so far as the east is from the west. With this said, I leave you with the lyrics to the chorus of the song "East to West" by Casting Crowns.
Jesus, can you show me just how far the east is from west,
Because I can't bear to see the man I've been come rising up in me again,
In the arms of your mercy I find rest,
Because You know just how far the east is from the west.
From one scarred hand to another.
Today, particularly, I am feeling strongly led to write about their song "East to West." Before they started playing that song Mark Hall (the lead singer) was talking about how often times we tend to dwell so much on our sin rather than who we really are in Christ because of what He did for us on the Cross. Personally, that was something that I really needed to hear. I am one that goes through times where I am pretty disgusted with my sin; and while I really do believe that is something that a Christian should feel in regards to their sin, I also believe that we can oftentimes belittle and "limit" God's grace because of it. But here's the thing: yes, we should get to that point with our sin to where we are just so disgusted with it and cry out to God that it be removed from our lives; but instead of dwelling on that, and letting that rule your thoughts, cast it down at Christ's feet and know that no matter what your sin is, it is indeed covered by Him. Have that knowledge of sin in your life, know what the sin is, pray to get rid of it, but don't dwell on it. Dwell on Christ and what He did for you; dwell on the fact that yes, our sin is terrible, but yes, God has covered it with the blood of His Son. Let the horridness of your sin make you so overwhelmed with love for our God who has taken it away through His Son! This is something that God is still teaching me, but by His amazing grace, I know that I will at some point in my life grasp the reality of the above. While I do grasp it at times, I long and pray that I may be able to grasp it all of the time!
"So far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:12
"I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me." Galatians 2:20
Those two verses out of the Bible are two verses that are very dear and near to my heart. I pray that God continues to use them mightily in my life, that I may be able to see who I am in His Son, that I may be able to read them and know that it is no longer I who live, but Christ Who lives in me. That I may know that the life that I now live I live by faith in Him, Who loved me and gave Himself for me and you. That I may know that He has cast my sin so far as the east is from the west. With this said, I leave you with the lyrics to the chorus of the song "East to West" by Casting Crowns.
Jesus, can you show me just how far the east is from west,
Because I can't bear to see the man I've been come rising up in me again,
In the arms of your mercy I find rest,
Because You know just how far the east is from the west.
From one scarred hand to another.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Pursue the Passion
As I sit down to write this post, I'm not sure what the affects of it will be. I am writing this post purely because I feel that I need to; I feel that God is leading me to. Something has been on my heart and mind over these past months; something that has been concerning me for two years now. This something is the need for Christians to step out and do something for our God. There is so much that needs to be done in our country and throughout the world; there is so much that we, as God's children, could be doing to share the love of Christ in whatever way we feel led, all for the glory of Him. There is just so much, but so few of us choose to actually step out and do something. Sure, we can all spend years talking about doing something, but when do we really step out and do it? When does the talking end and the doing start? It could very well start now.
There are so many passions that I have in life that I feel God is using or will use for His glory. Some of the things that He has given me a passion for, I have stepped out and pursued. Maybe not in big ways, but I am taking and using the passions that He has given me either way, big or small. My heart breaks every time I see a baby or small child that is nothing but skin and bones in a poverty-stricken country. When seeing those pictures, all I want to do is take that child and love and nurture them back to health. God has given me a passion for stopping poverty, and helping those who are living in it. The way in which I am trying to fulfill that passion, as of now, is by sponsoring a little girl in Rwanda, Africa. While that is not big; it is something. It is the way in which God has called me to take action in regards to stopping poverty, and it has blessed my life amazingly. One area that I have a passion for is reaching out to troubled teen girls in my own country; and showing them that they can find the True Love that they are looking for in Christ; a True Love that provides the Love that no man could ever give them; a Love that they are truly seeking after; a Love that can truly only be found in Christ. So far, the only way in which I have stepped out and followed this passion for God's glory is by being friends with troubled teen girls. That's it. Nothing big, but I do pray God uses it as He wills. Excitingly, God has been leading my best friend and I very strongly to start a ministry for troubled teen girls in the future. It will be a very long term goal, but most definitely a goal worth pursuing!
So, now that I have explained my passion and how I am stepping out and pursuing them; I want to ask you all some questions: What is your passion driven towards? How could you be stepping out and pursuing those passions for God's glory? Think about those questions. Is your passion driven towards stopping poverty in other countries? Then get involved with an organization that helps stop poverty, or start an organization with like-minded people over time. Is your passion driven towards stopping the sickening things that are happening in our very own country? Then find ways, start ways, or get involved with ways to stop those things. If you have a passion to start something that could take years to make happen, then start on it now; move toward that goal; pray to God that you can obtain it for His glory. We are God's people; His children. If He gives us a passion, are we going to sit here and just talk about how we could take that passion and use it, or are we actually going to step out and doing something with that passion? Over this past year, my eyes have been opened to how lazy we all can be in this area; but I have also seen the outcome when people have taken their passion and done something with it for God's glory. The results of that can be amazing! Yet, there are just so many teens; so many young adults; so many adults, even, that have such amazing passions but do absolutely nothing with them. This has got to stop! We are not called to live our life for ourselves; we are not called to do nothing. We are called to glorify God with our time here on earth; we are called to step out and do things for others so that they may see His love and His glorious name written across every word; every action; and every thing we do.
Today, as I was driving home from the store with my three sisters, the song "My Own Little World" by Matthew West came on the radio. As I turned up the volume and just listened; that song spoke to my heart. There is a bigger picture in life outside of our own little world; there is a greater purpose for our lives then just sitting in our own little world. I love these lyrics in that song: "Father, break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see, that my own little world is not about me." We can do so much with God; we can do those things talked about, yet never done; we can step-out of our own little world; we can do all with the help of our God; we can do all with the One who empowers us with the ability and the strength to do so; we can do all things through Him! So, please, let us all step out of our own little worlds; let us all, as the children of God, make a difference in a world that is broken.
There are so many passions that I have in life that I feel God is using or will use for His glory. Some of the things that He has given me a passion for, I have stepped out and pursued. Maybe not in big ways, but I am taking and using the passions that He has given me either way, big or small. My heart breaks every time I see a baby or small child that is nothing but skin and bones in a poverty-stricken country. When seeing those pictures, all I want to do is take that child and love and nurture them back to health. God has given me a passion for stopping poverty, and helping those who are living in it. The way in which I am trying to fulfill that passion, as of now, is by sponsoring a little girl in Rwanda, Africa. While that is not big; it is something. It is the way in which God has called me to take action in regards to stopping poverty, and it has blessed my life amazingly. One area that I have a passion for is reaching out to troubled teen girls in my own country; and showing them that they can find the True Love that they are looking for in Christ; a True Love that provides the Love that no man could ever give them; a Love that they are truly seeking after; a Love that can truly only be found in Christ. So far, the only way in which I have stepped out and followed this passion for God's glory is by being friends with troubled teen girls. That's it. Nothing big, but I do pray God uses it as He wills. Excitingly, God has been leading my best friend and I very strongly to start a ministry for troubled teen girls in the future. It will be a very long term goal, but most definitely a goal worth pursuing!
So, now that I have explained my passion and how I am stepping out and pursuing them; I want to ask you all some questions: What is your passion driven towards? How could you be stepping out and pursuing those passions for God's glory? Think about those questions. Is your passion driven towards stopping poverty in other countries? Then get involved with an organization that helps stop poverty, or start an organization with like-minded people over time. Is your passion driven towards stopping the sickening things that are happening in our very own country? Then find ways, start ways, or get involved with ways to stop those things. If you have a passion to start something that could take years to make happen, then start on it now; move toward that goal; pray to God that you can obtain it for His glory. We are God's people; His children. If He gives us a passion, are we going to sit here and just talk about how we could take that passion and use it, or are we actually going to step out and doing something with that passion? Over this past year, my eyes have been opened to how lazy we all can be in this area; but I have also seen the outcome when people have taken their passion and done something with it for God's glory. The results of that can be amazing! Yet, there are just so many teens; so many young adults; so many adults, even, that have such amazing passions but do absolutely nothing with them. This has got to stop! We are not called to live our life for ourselves; we are not called to do nothing. We are called to glorify God with our time here on earth; we are called to step out and do things for others so that they may see His love and His glorious name written across every word; every action; and every thing we do.
Today, as I was driving home from the store with my three sisters, the song "My Own Little World" by Matthew West came on the radio. As I turned up the volume and just listened; that song spoke to my heart. There is a bigger picture in life outside of our own little world; there is a greater purpose for our lives then just sitting in our own little world. I love these lyrics in that song: "Father, break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see, that my own little world is not about me." We can do so much with God; we can do those things talked about, yet never done; we can step-out of our own little world; we can do all with the help of our God; we can do all with the One who empowers us with the ability and the strength to do so; we can do all things through Him! So, please, let us all step out of our own little worlds; let us all, as the children of God, make a difference in a world that is broken.
Friday, July 16, 2010
A Beautiful Thing
Before getting started on this post, I wanted to say this: it seems that every time I take some sort of computer fast I have something laid on my heart to write about. During this particular computer fast, God definitely did lay on my heart something that I needed to write about, and I am very grateful for that. It was something that I didn't just feel that I needed to write about, but I literally needed to write about it; I needed to get my thoughts on this written down on paper. Through doing so, I believe that it helped me, personally, quite a bit. So, hopefully the following doesn't totally bore ya'll!
1 Timothy 5:1-2
"Do not rebuke an older man, but exhort him as a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, with all purity."
I simply love those two verses in 1st Timothy chapter 5. They hold so much, and are a constant reminder of how we should treat/view older men, younger men, older women, and younger women. What I particularly like the most about those two verses are the parts about young men and young women, and how they should be looked at as brothers and sisters. Now, I also value and find helpful the parts in those verses referring to older men and older women, but, personally, I have found the parts about young men and young women to be more helpful, and something that I can value more/learn from more at the moment. Why do I feel that way? Because I believe that my fellow young ladies and I need to hear the part of those verses about young men. Likewise, young men need to hear the part of those verses about young women. In those verses, we get the message (or at least I do) that young men should be viewed and treated as brothers and young women are to be viewed and treated as sisters, with all purity. That is something that not many of us do--young men and young women alike. Among quite a few; it is something that is not being put into practice, nor is it even considered important. Yet, it is. There is a great importance in young women viewing young men as their brothers in Christ, just as there is a great importance in young men viewing young women as their sisters in Christ.
It is truly a beautiful thing when that is applied to a young man and young woman's friendship. Why is it so beautiful? Because through doing so they are respecting each other; through doing so they are helping each other; through doing so they are protecting each other's heart; through doing so they can love each other with a pure love; with a God-honoring and God-glorifying love; a brotherly and sisterly love. I wish that this was something more young men and young women took seriously. If so, many of them wouldn't have a broken heart; many of them would be able to find joy and pleasure in their friendship with the opposite gender; many of them would be able to have close, edifying, God-honoring brother/sister relationships. Yet, that is not the case. Because of the lack of importance that young men and young women put into calling the opposite gender brothers/sisters, and respecting them and protecting them as they should through that; there are more and will continue to be many broken hearts and hurt.
I praise God for helping me to realize the importance of what was written above! I know that it is only by His grace alone that I am able to view all Christian young men as my brothers in Christ; and in doing so, protecting myself and them. However, I am not perfect at this; I will still have my struggles with this at times. And the question always arises (and I mean always): if/when you become interested in/have feelings for a young man/young woman, does that then mean that you shouldn't call him/her your brother/sister, or shouldn't still try to view him/her as your brother/sister? I believe that we should always try to view young men and young women as our brothers and sisters; no matter what. Though an interest and feelings may arise; we should always try to view young men and young women as our brothers and sisters in Christ. Always. I believe that it is more important in that case than in any other. We have a responsibility to protect the other's heart. At all times and at all costs. That is simply our duty as Christian men and women. I believe that the one and only time a young man and a young woman should consider each other/view each other more than a brother or sister in Christ is when they have entered into courtship. That is the only time. Other than that, by not considering a young man or a young woman as your brother or sister in Christ; you are opening a door to hurtfulness. And not only may it hurt you, but it could hurt the other, as well.
I know that when we are faced with the challenge of not thinking more of a brother/sister in Christ; it can be hard. But, I have found a great encouragement in 1st Timothy 5:1-2 when it comes to that. It is such a great reminder to myself, and I pray that others may feel the same. We truly do have to strive to keep our brothers/sisters in Christ as brothers/sisters in Christ when those feelings/interests arise. It is not always easy; it will most likely never be easy. Yet, it is indeed needed and necessary. We have that duty to protect each other as brothers and sisters in Christ. When we need help to do so; we can do so by constantly praying and focusing our heart and our mind on God and God alone. It is so worth it. In the long run; it definitely will be worth it!
I hope and pray that the above post did not just seem like myself rambling on and on about some subject that I tend to have a passion for, and want to see done amongst others, because that's not the case. I felt led to write this. This is what has been on my heart; this is what God has been teaching me; and this is what He led me to write about. Through writing this; He has blessed me. I pray that it may truly bless some of you, if that is His will, and I certainly hope this didn't seem like rambling! I pray that the Lord will be the center of all of our hearts and all of our minds! He is truly the only One that deserves it; and I pray that by His grace I and others can truly obtain that to the best of our human ability!
Soli Deo Gloria!
1 Timothy 5:1-2
"Do not rebuke an older man, but exhort him as a father, younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, younger women as sisters, with all purity."
I simply love those two verses in 1st Timothy chapter 5. They hold so much, and are a constant reminder of how we should treat/view older men, younger men, older women, and younger women. What I particularly like the most about those two verses are the parts about young men and young women, and how they should be looked at as brothers and sisters. Now, I also value and find helpful the parts in those verses referring to older men and older women, but, personally, I have found the parts about young men and young women to be more helpful, and something that I can value more/learn from more at the moment. Why do I feel that way? Because I believe that my fellow young ladies and I need to hear the part of those verses about young men. Likewise, young men need to hear the part of those verses about young women. In those verses, we get the message (or at least I do) that young men should be viewed and treated as brothers and young women are to be viewed and treated as sisters, with all purity. That is something that not many of us do--young men and young women alike. Among quite a few; it is something that is not being put into practice, nor is it even considered important. Yet, it is. There is a great importance in young women viewing young men as their brothers in Christ, just as there is a great importance in young men viewing young women as their sisters in Christ.
It is truly a beautiful thing when that is applied to a young man and young woman's friendship. Why is it so beautiful? Because through doing so they are respecting each other; through doing so they are helping each other; through doing so they are protecting each other's heart; through doing so they can love each other with a pure love; with a God-honoring and God-glorifying love; a brotherly and sisterly love. I wish that this was something more young men and young women took seriously. If so, many of them wouldn't have a broken heart; many of them would be able to find joy and pleasure in their friendship with the opposite gender; many of them would be able to have close, edifying, God-honoring brother/sister relationships. Yet, that is not the case. Because of the lack of importance that young men and young women put into calling the opposite gender brothers/sisters, and respecting them and protecting them as they should through that; there are more and will continue to be many broken hearts and hurt.
I praise God for helping me to realize the importance of what was written above! I know that it is only by His grace alone that I am able to view all Christian young men as my brothers in Christ; and in doing so, protecting myself and them. However, I am not perfect at this; I will still have my struggles with this at times. And the question always arises (and I mean always): if/when you become interested in/have feelings for a young man/young woman, does that then mean that you shouldn't call him/her your brother/sister, or shouldn't still try to view him/her as your brother/sister? I believe that we should always try to view young men and young women as our brothers and sisters; no matter what. Though an interest and feelings may arise; we should always try to view young men and young women as our brothers and sisters in Christ. Always. I believe that it is more important in that case than in any other. We have a responsibility to protect the other's heart. At all times and at all costs. That is simply our duty as Christian men and women. I believe that the one and only time a young man and a young woman should consider each other/view each other more than a brother or sister in Christ is when they have entered into courtship. That is the only time. Other than that, by not considering a young man or a young woman as your brother or sister in Christ; you are opening a door to hurtfulness. And not only may it hurt you, but it could hurt the other, as well.
I know that when we are faced with the challenge of not thinking more of a brother/sister in Christ; it can be hard. But, I have found a great encouragement in 1st Timothy 5:1-2 when it comes to that. It is such a great reminder to myself, and I pray that others may feel the same. We truly do have to strive to keep our brothers/sisters in Christ as brothers/sisters in Christ when those feelings/interests arise. It is not always easy; it will most likely never be easy. Yet, it is indeed needed and necessary. We have that duty to protect each other as brothers and sisters in Christ. When we need help to do so; we can do so by constantly praying and focusing our heart and our mind on God and God alone. It is so worth it. In the long run; it definitely will be worth it!
I hope and pray that the above post did not just seem like myself rambling on and on about some subject that I tend to have a passion for, and want to see done amongst others, because that's not the case. I felt led to write this. This is what has been on my heart; this is what God has been teaching me; and this is what He led me to write about. Through writing this; He has blessed me. I pray that it may truly bless some of you, if that is His will, and I certainly hope this didn't seem like rambling! I pray that the Lord will be the center of all of our hearts and all of our minds! He is truly the only One that deserves it; and I pray that by His grace I and others can truly obtain that to the best of our human ability!
Soli Deo Gloria!
Friday, April 23, 2010
How Great is My God!
So, today, I have decided to write about a couple of things that God has truly blessed me with thinking about. Specifically, things that God chose to really lay on my heart, and these things He showed to me through lines from a couple of hymns, while singing for my fourth year in my choir. God has used music and lyrics to reach my life in wonderful ways. He uses them to uplift, encourage, and comfort me, but He also has used them to reveal to me some things about how wonderful He truly is! Often times, I know what lyrics are saying, I understand them -- I understand the message that is intended to reach people through those lyrics. But there are times, like these, when God really just places certain lines on my heart. Not only to know what they are saying, but truly take those lines to heart and actually get all that I can, for God's glory, out of those particular lines.
The lines that really just "got me" the most, the lines that I felt I really must write about, are taken out of two pretty well known hymns: "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God" and "How Deep the Father's Love for Us." The line from, "How Deep the Father's Love for Us" that really got to me the most is the following:
"Behold the Man upon the cross, my sin upon His shoulders; ashamed, I hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers. It was my sin that held Him there until it was accomplished; His dying breath has brought me life -- I know that it is finished."
The line from "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God" that really got to me the most is the following:
"Let goods and kindred go,
This mortal life also
The body they may kill;
God's truth abideth still!"
Those lines from those amazing hymns just truly got to my heart. More so the line from "How Deep the Father's Love for Us." When I think about that line, the one thought that just comes to my mind is, "Wow." It was my sin upon my Savior's shoulders; it was my sin that held Him, Holy and True, to the cross. Yes, I have always known that, but never did it hit me as hard as it did when I was singing those lines in that hymn -- I broke down in tears. Right in the middle of singing. My heart was overwhelmed. It just hit me right then and there -- the reality of what Jesus Christ did for me, who truly deserves nothing. It hit me in such a way that it never has before. It was overall a blessing. It truly just brings me to my knees in complete and total love for my Savior -- Who gave His life for my wrongs.
1 John 4:9-10 says,
"In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins."
What amazing verses are those! What greater love is there than that of the love God has for us? What greater love is there than that what is portrayed to us, by our Savior, Who died for our sins? There is no greater love. None at all. God's love is true love -- the Love that we all want and desperately need! We are not deserving, yet we receive that Love. I truly cannot even comprehend that thought fully! But it brings me to tears! I am overwhelmed with love for my Savior, Who chose to love me; to die for me, so that I can in turn love Him! My prayer is that He would help me love Him to the fullest -- that I may love him as much as I humanly can -- that my love for Him may remain the complete and total center of my life!
When I think about the lines in "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God," I am humbled before my God. My complete and total desire is to focus on Him alone, and keep Him the center and focus of my life (which I fail miserably at, at times). He loves me, He died for me -- do I not owe Him my life, my entire being? Am I willing to let goods, my kindred, even this mortal life go? Can I do that? Does not my God deserve my life and everything I am? You better believe it! He deserves everything. He deserves my time, my praise, my prayer, my love for Him -- everything. What should I let go of? I should let go of all things; all earthly things -- even my very life that I am living. That is not something that is easy to grasp. But it is true!
I am just coming back from taking a little over a week long fast from the computer, and I gave the time off of it to my God. It was not easy letting go of a very great pleasure for just a week's time. Do I think that it was a blessing? Yes. Can I do it again? You bet I can! But this is only letting go of a very small pleasure. Could I let go of my life for His glory? Could I let go just like all of the other God-fearing men and women who were killed because of their love for Christ Jesus and for the furthering of His kingdom? Could I really and truly do that? I very firmly, in my heart, believe that I can. But only with God's strength, with His Mighty Fortress. I do believe that I could die for the cause of Christ today, tomorrow, in a week, in a month, a year, or years from now. But only through His strength could I do so. How little are the things that we let go of! How little it was to fast from the computer for a week, yet how difficult! It was so difficult! We must learn to let go of the small things before we can ever even think of letting go of the big!
These are the things that God layed on my heart. My God is great! He is King! He owns my life!
Soli Deo Gloria!
The lines that really just "got me" the most, the lines that I felt I really must write about, are taken out of two pretty well known hymns: "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God" and "How Deep the Father's Love for Us." The line from, "How Deep the Father's Love for Us" that really got to me the most is the following:
"Behold the Man upon the cross, my sin upon His shoulders; ashamed, I hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers. It was my sin that held Him there until it was accomplished; His dying breath has brought me life -- I know that it is finished."
The line from "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God" that really got to me the most is the following:
"Let goods and kindred go,
This mortal life also
The body they may kill;
God's truth abideth still!"
Those lines from those amazing hymns just truly got to my heart. More so the line from "How Deep the Father's Love for Us." When I think about that line, the one thought that just comes to my mind is, "Wow." It was my sin upon my Savior's shoulders; it was my sin that held Him, Holy and True, to the cross. Yes, I have always known that, but never did it hit me as hard as it did when I was singing those lines in that hymn -- I broke down in tears. Right in the middle of singing. My heart was overwhelmed. It just hit me right then and there -- the reality of what Jesus Christ did for me, who truly deserves nothing. It hit me in such a way that it never has before. It was overall a blessing. It truly just brings me to my knees in complete and total love for my Savior -- Who gave His life for my wrongs.
1 John 4:9-10 says,
"In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins."
What amazing verses are those! What greater love is there than that of the love God has for us? What greater love is there than that what is portrayed to us, by our Savior, Who died for our sins? There is no greater love. None at all. God's love is true love -- the Love that we all want and desperately need! We are not deserving, yet we receive that Love. I truly cannot even comprehend that thought fully! But it brings me to tears! I am overwhelmed with love for my Savior, Who chose to love me; to die for me, so that I can in turn love Him! My prayer is that He would help me love Him to the fullest -- that I may love him as much as I humanly can -- that my love for Him may remain the complete and total center of my life!
When I think about the lines in "A Mighty Fortress Is Our God," I am humbled before my God. My complete and total desire is to focus on Him alone, and keep Him the center and focus of my life (which I fail miserably at, at times). He loves me, He died for me -- do I not owe Him my life, my entire being? Am I willing to let goods, my kindred, even this mortal life go? Can I do that? Does not my God deserve my life and everything I am? You better believe it! He deserves everything. He deserves my time, my praise, my prayer, my love for Him -- everything. What should I let go of? I should let go of all things; all earthly things -- even my very life that I am living. That is not something that is easy to grasp. But it is true!
I am just coming back from taking a little over a week long fast from the computer, and I gave the time off of it to my God. It was not easy letting go of a very great pleasure for just a week's time. Do I think that it was a blessing? Yes. Can I do it again? You bet I can! But this is only letting go of a very small pleasure. Could I let go of my life for His glory? Could I let go just like all of the other God-fearing men and women who were killed because of their love for Christ Jesus and for the furthering of His kingdom? Could I really and truly do that? I very firmly, in my heart, believe that I can. But only with God's strength, with His Mighty Fortress. I do believe that I could die for the cause of Christ today, tomorrow, in a week, in a month, a year, or years from now. But only through His strength could I do so. How little are the things that we let go of! How little it was to fast from the computer for a week, yet how difficult! It was so difficult! We must learn to let go of the small things before we can ever even think of letting go of the big!
These are the things that God layed on my heart. My God is great! He is King! He owns my life!
Soli Deo Gloria!
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